Monday, October 08, 2007

TOP TEN REJECTED BIBLE ONE-LINERS

Top Ten Rejected Bible One-liners

10. Q: What kind of man was Boaz before he married Ruth?
A: Ruthless

9. Q: What do they call pastors in Germany?
A: German Shepherds

8. Q: Who was the greatest male financier in the Bible?
A: Noah. He was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation

7. Q: Who was the greatest female financier in the Bible?
A: Pharaoh's daughter. She went down to the bank of the Nile and drew out a little prophet

6. Q: What kind of cars are in the Bible?
A: Jehovah drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden in a Fury. David's Triumph was heard throughout the land. Also, probably a Honda, because the apostles were all in one Accord

5. Q: Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible?
A: Samson. He brought the house down

4. Q: What excuse did Adam give to his children as to why he no longer lived in Eden?
A: Your mother ate us out of house and home

3. Q: Which servant of God was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible?
A: Moses. He broke all 10 commandments at once

2. Q: Which area of Palestine was especially wealthy?
A: The area around Jordan. The banks were always overflowing

And the number one rejected bible one-liner...

1. Q: Who was the first tennis player in the bible?
A: Joseph. He served in Pharaoh's court

-Jason Rohrblogger
(10/07/07)

And the alternates...

Q: Who is the greatest babysitter mentioned in the Bible?
A: David. He rocked Goliath to a very deep sleep

Q: Which Bible character had no parents?
A: Joshua, son of Nun

Q: Why didn't they play cards on the Ark?
A: Because Noah was standing on the deck

Q: Did you know it's a sin for a woman to make coffee?
A: In the Bible it says,"He-brews"

4 comments:

  1. Jason,

    Those are so bad that they cracked me up. I am going to have to link to it. They were very pun-ful.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous8:20 PM

    HAHA your bible one liners are hilarious!
    Keep it up.
    Happy Canadian Thanks Giving

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous6:00 PM

    The Man of Leisure says "nice."

    Nice.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous12:56 PM

    You're crazy!
    Love your blog!
    Hope you don;t mind if I plagiarize this one day.
    i'll post in my friendster and honor you with the link to your blog itself!
    may i?

    ReplyDelete