Top Ten Projects In Development At KFC
10. A fat free "super-chicken" with four breasts and eight legs, yet no thighs or ribs
9. New nugget texture: Extra Soggy
8. An insulated disposable paper bucket with separate compartments for 15 pieces of chicken, 4 large fries, and 1 gallon of ice cold soda that can withstand 5 minutes in a 350 degree deep fat fryer
7. Drive-Thru restrooms
6. A NASA-approved freeze dried chicken pot pie that can be consumed through a straw
5. Catsup flavored Ketchup
4. A non-flammable petroleum based synthetic Ranch-flavored dressing-style reconstituted condiment dispensed in .0005oz indestructible packets
3. Boneless cheesecake
2. A more sophisticated Post-Doctor Pepper
And the number one project in development at KFC...
1. Immediate deployment of a potato fueled Detroyer-class Gravy Boat followed by a unilateral Declaration of Allegience to Colonalisimo Sanders
-Jason Rohrblogger
(07/27/98)
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