TOP TEN WAYS TO QUIT SMOKING

Top Ten Ways to Quit Smoking

10. Smoke twenty joints in one day instead

9. Completely stop eating or having sex

8. Receive one pie in the face every time you light up (clowns only)

7. Freebase the nicotine

6. Exploding cigarettes

5. Warm turkey

4. Tongue-kiss Joe Camel every time you feel like a smoke

3. Switch to a bubble-pipe

2. Replace the fine tobacco normally served with Folger's Crystals

And the number one way to quit smoking...

1. Stop breathing

-Jason Rohrblogger
(11/3/10)