TOP TEN SECRET PROJECTS IN DEVELOPMENT AT VICK'S

Top Ten Secret Projects In Development At Vick's

10. An inhaler that sterilizes game show contestants.

9. The Vap-O-Rub hot tub

8. A genetically engineered cold virus that temporarily changes brown eyes to blue.

7. Vick's 44 "Magnum" cough supressing condom

6. Mentholated crack

5. Nyquil, now with Viagra! The coughing, sneezing, aching, stuffy headed, fever, so you can get it up, medicine.

4. Mochaccino flavored expectorant

3. Blisterine: mouthwash with nonoxynol 9

2. A normal looking medicine cup that is deadly when used with Robitussin

And the number one secret project in development at Vick's...

1. Strawberry flavored chewable children's Valium. The bedtime snack that makes bedtime last for up to three days!

-Jason Rohrblogger
(02/10/99)