TOP TEN JASON APOLOGIES

Top Ten Jason Apologies

10. I would like to apologize to all the farm animals I slept with who work for me on this blog

9. I regret taking steroids while I wrote my lists

8. I'm especially contrite over all the lame jokes I've made at the expense of Sarah Palin

7. My behavoir has hurt the real humor writers on the internet, and for that I am remorseful

6. I'm sorry for bringing sexy back

5. I owe Sir Mix-a-lot several apologies

4. I'm sorry my actions have been perceived by others to be egregious. I'm not sorry for my actions, just the perception that they were bad

3. I regret my misplaced unresolved anger towards Belgium

2. I replaced the fine apology normally served with Folger's Crystals to see if anyone notices. I regret the error

And the number one Jason apology...

1. Please forgive my complete lack of humor, originality, or ethics. My behavoir is a result of society, my upbringing, excessive alcohol, poor hygiene, drugs, American culture, the language barrier, and Sarah Palin

-Jason Rohrblogger
(10/13/09)