TOP TEN SIGNS IT IS HANUKKAH IN PHOENIX, ARIZONA

Top Ten Signs it is Hanukkah in Phoenix, Arizona

10. Kids spin fully automatic assault dreidel made of clay

 9. Bubbe serves gefilte tamales

 8. Manischewitz has a worm in the bottom of the bottle

 7. Why is tonight different than any other night? It is not 117°F in the shade.

 6. Sufganiyot tastes suspiciously like a tortilla stuffed with manteca 

 5. Mormonides comes down from Utah to read the Torah

 4. Half the gelt are pesos

 3. Combo plate includes: refried latkes, carne Masada tacos, and kosher carnitas

 2. Family only has enough peyote for one night, but it lasts for eight

And the number one sign it is Hanukkah in Phoenix, Arizona...

 1. Mohel cuts off the end of your chimichanga 

-Jason Rohrblogger (12/9/18)