TOP TEN WOODY ALLEN QUOTES

Top Ten Woody Allen Quotes

10. "If there is reincarnation, I'd like to come back as Pamela Anderson's fingertips."

9. "Love is the answer...but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty interesting questions."

8. "I tended to place my wife under a pedestal."

7. "Confidence is what you have before you understand the problem."

6. "Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it."

5. "I didn't know he was dead...I thought he was British."

4. "Eternity is a very long time, especially towards the end."

3. "My brain? it's my second favorite organ."

2. "I've often said: the only thing standing between me and greatness...is me."

And the number one Woody Allen quote...

1. "Don't knock masturbation - it's sex with someone I love."

-Jason Rohrblogger
(03/29/08)

"I don't know the question, but sex is definitely the answer."
"You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred."
"Sex is only dirty if it's done right."
"If only God would give me some clear sign! Like...making a large deposit in my name in a Swiss bank."
"I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own."
"The last time I was inside a woman was when I went to the Statue of Liberty"
"Sex between two people is a beautiful thing; between five it's fantastic."
"If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans."
"Life is like a concentration camp... you can't leave without dying."
"I failed to make the chess team because of my height."
"Capital punishment would be more effective as a preventive measure if it were administered prior to the crime."
"Talk is what you suffer through so you can get to sex."
"Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television."
"It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens."
"My one regret in life is that I am not someone else."