TOP TEN TABLOID STORIES I'D LIKE TO SEE

Top Ten Tabloid Stories I'd Like to See

10. Barrack Obama's love child with Nicole Brown Simpson

9. 98lb Oprah: "I am NOT anorexic!"

8. Lindsey Lohan/Paris Hilton sex tape

7. Perez Hilton dating Miss USA

6. Nostradamus predicts you will have spaghetti for lunch

5. Jennifer Aniston pregnant with Brad Pitt's octuplets

4. Spencer Pratt leaves Heidi Montag for even younger, hotter, needier woman

3. Blind item: what well-known TV personality goes home to her husband and kids every night and makes dinner?

2. Paparazzi catch Amy Winehouse at church and then the library

And the number on tabloid item I'd like to see...

1. Sober Mel Gibson arrested on outstanding warrants. He's completely respectful to everyone, and apologizes to his wife for everything

-Jason Rohrblogger
(5/3/09)